Remember that dude who was the most popular guy in school, the captain of most sports teams, the chick magnet, the one who always got out of trouble and was the class clown? Yeah erm..that wasnt me. I stand by my pen and my thoughts.
Pbleepd, hub to the UK’s most vibrant e-mags and websites, is committed to constructive journalism, creative reporting and producing engaging publications. All of our online publication features some of the UK’s most talented young reporters, editors and photographers. Our mission is to create interactive publications that allow our readers not only to receive the content through new media, but to also have a good level of control on what is published. We aim to push the boundaries set by traditional media. Our 2009 projects aims to showcase this passion.
Hope you're all still enjoying the scriptwriting, it gets difficult sometimes to think ahead because 8 times out of 10 I usually know the whole story before I write a script so this has been tricky... ever so slightly. Anywho, part 12 AND 13 will premier next Sunday and you'll be able to make sense of certain character's roles in the story. There's more revelations to come, until then if you ever want to familiarise yourselves with the story so far, a link to each episode I've done so far can be seen on the right hand side.
As I get through the quarter-way point of MEN ON THE ROAD I've decided to bring a new! story to life. This script will feature every Wednesday so stay tuned. The name of the story is called The Wider Perspective. I won't tell you the storyline but I'll leave you with a clue....
It's funny how one event can change your life & take a new direction within 7 days...
If you don't know WHO or WHATPbleepd is right now, I guarantee by this time next year you will know. Check the right hand side and scroll near the bottom and check the description, better yet read my first blog, BETTER YET! go to www.pbleepd.com to understand. Next year we will in lamerns terms...GO HARD! We'll be advertising our brand in different forms of Media with our re-developed Myspace and Facebook pages, Pbleepd Radio FINALLY airs in January and look out for upcoming Pbleepd adverts scripted by yours truly throughout the year.
We'll continue pushing different avenues of the company through our blog, Barbershop pages, FanTube (coming soon) and our development programme (also coming soon). The most important push will be the slogan "User Generated Media" It's all about getting others involved and we will continue to encourage that aspect until we fold! lol. Now alot of people are having trouble pronouncing the name which is no fault of their own so below is the pronounciation equation.
In the car park of the local shopping centre Julian sits in the driver's chair alone sipping on milkshake from McDonalds. He has a small amount of time to think to himself and decides to call Jane. After one ring the phone is forwarded to voicemail, his lips quiver and he puts the phone in his pocket. As he looks up he beeps his horn.
Julian
Get off my car you nonce
Gerald who’s sitting on the car bonnet looks back at Julian
Gerald
You What?
Julian
This car is 3 years young, I don’t need your lard ass causing damages Gerald gets of the bonnet and heads towards the passenger door The rules still apply no food in my car
Gerald
Julian lighten up, this weekend’s supposed to be your getaway. Just relax. I’ve finished anyway
Julian
No you’re not
Julian looks at Gerald’s drink
Gerald
Are you serious? What about you?
Julian
Uhm I’m not sure if you’ve noticed but…This is my car!
Gerald
I think I’m at that age now where I know how to keep a drink in my mouth Gerald steps into the car and takes a sip of his drink, he spits out his coke.She’s like a stalker, a really attractive stalker Gerald stares forward as the curvaceous woman from before walks. Her hips shaking side to side in slow motion. Ritchie comes from round the corner and stops in front of her. They begin to talk as Gerald continues staring. That little….he’s gonna get the number, no he’s not gonna get the number, Oh my god he’s got her number. Can you believe that Julian? Julian? Gerald turns towards Julian who is dripping in cokeOh, Oh Im so sorry, hey at least it never spilt on the car. There goes your vein again
Ritchie steps into the car and sits down with a bag full of sports clothes. His smile spreads wide as he looks towards Gerald and Julian
Ritchie
I think Im something special, every girl I touch just succumbs to my power. It’s actually quite scary. Julian you’ve got coke on your face
Meanwhile Kim and Sebastian are still in conversation..
Kim
What?
Sebastian Huh? Oh nothing, I forgot something
Kim I’m not stupid Sebastian
Sebastian I should hope not
Kim Where are the condoms?
Sebastian I don’t know! They’re yours why you asking me!?
Kim I was with you the last time I saw them, and now they’re missing. You put two and two together and…
Sebastian You make 4? SilenceIm sorry, but seriously I don’t have them. Have another look in your room…what the? Sebastian’s car suddenly stops, Sebastian tries to restart it but fails
Kim I know where I put them! Someone’s taking them
Sebastian
Kim my car’s just stopped in the middle of the road. F%!? SAKE! Erm, laughs a littleIm gonna need another favour
Back on the road, Julian sends a text to Sebastian as he’s driving. Ritchie and Gerald are in conversation about earlier. Gerald is holding a sheet of paper with the curvaceous girl’s contact details.
Gerald
Tequila?
Ritchie
Yeah funny, yet sexy. She just moved in the area, been watching me for a while apparently.
Gerald
And you're not in the least concerned about a girl named after alcohol? Ritchie shakes his head How old is she?
Ritchie
21, just finished a degree in Mechanics, nice
Gerald
An educated girl who can use her hands. Do I detect love at first sight Ritchie?
Ritchie
Ha! Maybe from her perspective, I’m a man of few words and many women. What type of idiot would I be if I fell in love? Gerald stares at him No offense
Gerald
How is it that the guy with commitment issues still gets so many girls?
Ritchie
I don’t have commitment issues. I have an issue with commitment
Julian
Same thing
Ritchie
No it’s not. I have a gift of picking up women so easily, why put it to waste? These clothes? Points to his bags Discount from the girl at the counter. This chain? Holds his chain Girl next door bought it for me, I’m a chick magnet I can’t stay committed
Julian
Oh please spare me the plaudits. Your chain has cereal box written all over it. You’re a grown ass man who’s scared of maturing so you sleep around to feed your self lies
Gerald
Yeah what he said. I wouldnt wanna be you right now, I have one special woman; you’ve gotta put up with all these numerous sexually active girls who’d do anything to get into your bed and….I’ve actually lost my point
Julian
You’re getting older Ritchie. I know you want kids and as mad I’m sounding right now, you need to let go of all these women and settle down
Ritchie
What and argue like you and Jane? I’m not quite ready for that, no way, babies crying, wife nagging, No freaking way, maybe in 5 more years when I get tired of shagging
Julian (laughing)
You make marriage sound so pathetic, but right now I don’t blame you
Ritchie
Don’t get me wrong mate, you and Jane have a special thing going on but I just don’t see that being my future, at least not for now
Julian
Special thing? I doubt that Julian hesitatesThis is our first rough patch and look how it’s ended up. We’ve got years of ammunition to unload on each other, scary times ahead
Gerald
The delusions of the paranormal that is women
Julian & Gerald
Yeah
Ritchie
Listen boys the key to sustaining a relationship is to know how to handle those dreaded 3 P’s when they eventually come?
Johnny
What’s the 3 P’s?
Outside Jane’s House…
Evelyn
He’s a player, he’s a prick, he’s a punk!
Boy Erm...ok
Across the road a man steps out of his house in athletic gear and calls for the boy. He locks eyes with Evelyn and they both smile in admiration.
Evelyn is that your dad?
Boy Yeah
Evelyn bites her lip. The dad crosses the road and introduces himself
Season'sGreetings!!, hope you enjoyed your Xmas as much as I did. The Food was on point! (If only you knew!!) The jokes provided were hilarious!! Spent some good quality time with family and received some unexpected presents. It's all good!! Despite the whole theme of Xmas I've only been listening to Donny Hathaway's "This Christmas", everything else has been from the world of Hip-Hop and R'n'B. Two albums on heavy rotation for the past couple weeks have been Jamie Foxx's Intuition and Marsha Ambrosius' (Singing half of Floetry) mixtape, Yours Truly.
Everytime I listen to Intuition my ratings go up a little bit more, there are some certified bangers! on that album. Make sure you cop that someway, somehow. Favourite tunes are Blame It (Feat T-Pain), Overdose, I Dont Need It (Produced by Timbo), Weekend Lover, Love Brings Change & Freak'in Me (Feat Marsha Ambrosius).
Speaking of Miss Ambrosius her mixtape is a good listen. I aint heard much from her since she signed to Aftermath, but only success can come her way if she teams up with Dr Dre. Shout out to EB THE CELEB for providing the link to download the mixtape. Tracks that stood out for me were Cloud 9, Start...Finish and Take Care. If you wanna download the mixtape, click here mayne!
Am I the only one who ever wondered what the name of the Jazz track is in the opening credits of Boomerang? (evidently so). I searched high and low for the track and finally came across it. Boomerang is produced and sung by Marcus Miller (also features Raphael Saadiq). I prefer it as an instrumental but it's still pretty good. Speaking of Boomerang, R.I.P Eartha Kitt who played Lady Eloise (Maaaaarcus).
Broadband's Other Bangers on Rotation
Busta Rhymes Feat T-Pain & DJ Khaled - Blown The Game - Laugh The Foreign Exchange - Sweeter Than You Anthony Hamilton - Hard To Breathe Ron Browz Feat Swizz Beatz, Ludacris & Lik Kim - Pop Champagne (Remix) Q-Tip - You Ludacris Feat Common - Do The Right Thang Q-Tip - Official The Game Feat Raheem Devaughn - Touchdown Rich Boy - Drop
I'm gonna go fix myself a meal (again!) and try and tune in to Foxxhole Radio; last week's show was the best in a long while. Til Sunday' Be Easy!
The year was 2005, I was chilling in my dorm room at the most socially charged institution ever, Brunel University. I had just submitted my coursework for my International Business module, so I was feeling ALIVE! Usually after finishing coursework I'd round up the troops and see what the plans were for the evening but for some reason I had an urge to write a poem. There was no real reason behind it...I wasn't bored, I wasn't in need of closure, I just felt like doing it. I took a piece of paper from my printer and started writing. After 15 minutes I was done and my friend walked in at that exact moment. She read the poem, smiled, and said "Who Did You Steal This From?"...Sigh.
GRAMMAR - The Essay
Introduction
Let me define myself in one sentence, Too late, recognise that one verb or adjective Cannot elucidate the essence of my manhood I'll clarify what I mean through poetry
First Paragraph
I'm a sentence established through noun I'm a verse established through rhyme I'm a poem established through emotion Therefore I'm the core of what I create
Second Paragraph
Two arms, two legs, five senses, big head Let me analyse, criticise and materialise my emotions My childhood left scarred with an exclamation point So who needs onomatopoeia to explain?..
Main Argument
I'm not a metaphor but I do symbolise I'm not a similie but I show expression "I am not a speech" so dont confine me in these little 6's and 9's to just be followed by a reply
Alternative Argument
It's easy to explain who I am because I'm me, Yet there's a comma at the end of that sentence Does the pause mean there's things I dont know about myself? Ironic that the last sentence leaves a question....and a mark
Conclusion
Let me define myself in a sentence, I can't Let me define myself in a paragraph, I can't Let me define myself in an essay, I can't I can't define myself because I am a definition, Full Stop.
Natalie steadily eats her breakfast while Jane lays her head in her hands occasionally looking up at Michelle whose eyes are fixated in mid-air shaking her head and mumbling words to herself. Jane lays her head back in her hands, when she looks up she's startled by Michelle whose staring right at her..
Jane What?
Michelle Something just doesn't add up here, you know
Jane What do you want me to tell you? I'm on Cloud Nine? I'm at a content stage of my life right now? Julian is the best father and husband I could ever wish for? No Michelle those would be lies
Michelle I wasnt refering to your marriage but while we're on the subject what exactly was in your head when you decided to use the radio?
Jane I..I dont know
Michelle It's one thing to vent your frustrations, but when you do it nationally and make a laughing stock out of someone you "love" you are beyond In The Wrong
Jane Michelle, tell me something I'm not expecting to here! This is a failing situation; it's happened so we move on. Maybe the radio wasn't the best of mediums but I tell you one thing I'm not apologising for what I said, I needed to let loose
Michelle And let loose you did
Jane takes offense and stands up instantly, she walks towards Michelle
Jane What's wrong with you Michelle? seriously...the day I married Julian was the day you changed and ever since then I've had to put up with your negative vibes and your sly comments
Michelle stands up and walks towards Jane
Michelle Any "change" you supposedly see is a frigment of your imagination, I'm exactly how I've always been which I cant say for most people, I KNOW there's something here that aint right They stare at each other face to face while Natalie looks on Jane What makes you so sure of yourself?
Michelle ......call it female intuition
Seconds of silence while they stare each other down (no blinking)
Jane You know what? Get out
Natalie Whoa! Whoa! takes another bite of toast Let's calm down girls
Michelle Why am I getting warmer?
Jane No because you're being a bitch!.....Like sister, Like brother
They square up only for Natalie to intervene
Natalie Ok that's enough!! Jane there's no need for name calling, stay back. Michelle at the end of the day your friend and your brother are in a very tight patch at the moment. Don't question their love because you yourself saw them blossom from day one. Now you cool off and sit on the couch.
Michelle I'll do one better and leave
Jane Dejavu! Michelle picks up her things and opens the front doorIt's like watching a repeat, you go ahead and leave me like your brother did
Natalie and Michelle What?
Jane That's right, you wanna question who loves who? look at this ring on my finger and then go and check the drawer over there They all look at the drawer
Meanwhile Sebastian is racing home in his car. He looks at his watch and squirms at the time shown. He pulls out his phone and calls an acquaintance
Kim Hello
Sebastian Kim
Kim Hey Baby
Sebastian I need you to do me another favour
Kim More destractions?
Sebastian Please?
Kim I don't even know where they're going
Sebastian I have a text saying they'll be at the leisure centre, get there asap
Kim Ok. Tell me something, Why do I keep doing this for you?
Sebastian Because you love me and I always deliver?
Kim Yes you do..funny question, did you take the packet of condoms from my draw?
Sebastian's eyes light up
Sebastian Uhm. no.... Sebastian reaches into his front pocket but it's emptyOh shit!
Back at Jane's house a woman steps off the bus with two big sainsbury's bags, she smiles as she trots towards Jane's pathway, she is stopped by the hollering of the boy across the road who runs straight to her
Boy Excuse me, a man dropped this on his way to to his car as he was coming out of the house
The boy hands over a packet of condoms to the woman much to her astonishment
Evelyn Out of this house?.....Oh My God...That cheating Bastard!!
It's 9:40pm and Im having my first quiet saturday night in 3 Months. I'd been waiting for this day for AGES!. It seems 22+ years ago adults felt the urgent need to consumate in the first three months of the year because I've been to a birthday party literally every saturday (and some weekdays) since the end of September spending silly amounts of money on food, drink, cards, presents and clothes! So finally three months and 12 birthdays on Im sitting in the comfort of my chair, my stomach a little bloated from Jollof Rice and a tall glass of apple juice on my left hand side (Supermalt just isn't for me....dont judge me!)...but guess what? IM BORED!!! After spending the day reading blogs, watching Gillette Soccer Saturday and tending to my brother and his friends on his 12th Birthday (Happy Bday Julian) I can comfortably say I'm fidgety (oxy-moron) and bored! I like to relax but this is ridiculous!
There are options: I can read a book recommended by my friend "Seven Splendid Suns", I could continue editing the first series of my comedy drama script (I'll let you in on what I mean at a later date), I could wait and watch Match of the day which featured none of the top teams, I could listen to a couple albums (just downloaded Marsha Ambrosius' mixtape...sounds good) I could contribute to the Pbleepd Blog (had to do a little promo) or I could sleep....but really and truly I don't wanna do any of those things. The irony of it all is that if I do eventually go out I KNOW Im gonna come home dissappointed because where I went to wasnt worth it. Argh! I havent been bored in a long time, never shall I suffer like this again! Hit me up people!
In Summer 2007 I began writing a short film with two of my friends and after a couple of months it was completed (or so I thought). We were ready to film when it dawned on us that improvements had to be made. Fast forward to the end of 2008 and the script is officially completed. I am now in the process of sorting out the "technicalities" with a producer and film crew and we should expect post-production in the new year (February). By the end of Spring I'll have a trailer which will premier on this blogsite and www.pbleepd.com and have a private screening for the 15-20 minute film in Summer 2009. I'll keep you updated on the film POUND FOR POUND. In the meantime below is one of my favourite short films. Enjoy!
What’s up lads? Ritchie hands over a bag to Julian who puts it in his glove compartment. Johnny and Julian stare at him What?
JULIAN
Where’s your stuff?
RITCHIE
I’m wearing them
JULIAN
O....k today is light training and the match is tomorrow, this is a weekend trip
RITCHIE
I know, but you know I figured I needed some new gear so we might have to stop by…
JULIAN
No No No, we’re on a schedule mate, you alone have wasted at least an hour doing nothing and coming to the car with nothing. Meaning we’ve waited for nothing
RITCHIE
You're wrong...ish...alright fine. Why so uptight? …oh an argument
JULIAN
What, how do you know?
RITCHIE
Your lips are quivering
GERALD
See!
Julian touches his lips
JULIAN
No they’re not Ritchie nods his head to indicate that Julian’s lips are quivering Piss off! Can we go now?
GERALD
Turns out the Mrs isn’t happy with Julian’s performance
RITCHIE
Haha. How’d’ya mean?
JULIAN
What, where did that come from?
GERALD
Well he knows you had an argument, might as well tell him why
RITCHIE
Yeah Jules we’re all friends here, cant be that bad, what is it?
Julian stops the engine
JULIAN
Fine, Jane complained that I only last three minutes
Ritchie pauses
RITCHIE
Woooow
GERALD
My thought's exactly
JULIAN
Ok now we can g…
GERALD
Said it on radio too
RITCHIE
Nooo
GERALD
Yessir
RITCHIE
What station?
GERALD
109.9 Morning show with Tony and Mark
RITCHIE
You’re lying?
JULIAN
Thanks Gerald
RITCHIE
Sorry to hear this mate. Have you tried thinking about something else during sex?
GERALD
That’s what I suggested!
JULIAN
No Ritchie I haven’t tried thinking about something else, the sound of her moans overshadow my thoughts
RITCHIE
Wow, you should really try and process your thoughts on a different topic, it will work wonders
GERALD
I suggested Sheep, coz you know people think about them to get relaxed and fall asleep. Plus they can stop him from getting too aroused because they are unattractive animals.
RITCHIE
Yeah and hippos too
GERALD
And an ant…although it’s hard to tell coz they’re quite small
JULIAN
I have retards for friends Julian takes a deep breath and sighs
RITCHIE
Don’t worry mate by tomorrow you’ll be in ship-shape for the Mrs.... Duracell by man, Duracell by nature, just takes a little heart and a little stamina
