Monday, December 8, 2008

The Scriptwriter Chronicles: MEN ON THE ROAD (Part 8)

Part 8 - Close Call

Sebastian stops in mid-walk and looks at Jane whose eyes are wide open


Jane & Sebastian
Shit!


Sebastian
Who’s that?


Jane
I don’t know! Hence the term “Shit” Another knock Oh God! You don’t think it’s….?


Sebastian
So what if it is? Jane gives him a look Just ignore it. It’s probably that kid who hit my car with his new telescope coming to say sorry… or maybe a Jehovah’s witness?


Jane
You wish. I have to answer it either way, my car is in the driveway She jumps out of his arms and puts on her clothes, she reaches into the draw for her wedding rings and puts it on


Sebastian
Wow and with no hesitation, fair enough. He puts on his tracksuit top.


Jane
Think ahead Sebastian, I put it on so I don’t draw attention. How would it look to an outsider if I have a man in my house in addition to no wedding ring?


Sebastian
It would look like your husband walked out on you and now you seek a strong walks closer caring and closer virile and closer and handsome stud to make you truly happy. He attempts to kiss her but she puts her finger on his lips


Jane
Hold that thought.
Another knock You know what?...Hide!


Sebastian
What?


Jane
Yes!!


Sebastian
Erm…How about No?


Jane
If this turns out to be Julian, what are you gonna do?


Sebastian sighs and hides in the closet


Sebastian
Hurry up and get rid of whoever it is, I’ve gotta meet up with them soon


Jane
Shhh. Jane opens the door in anxiety. Her eyes drop in a sigh of relief as they make contact with two women outside


Natalie
I heard everything on the radio. You are a crazy b?%!h…and I love it. Is everything alright?


Jane
Yeah it’s fine, I was just you know, frustrated but I’m good now. I’m kinda busy right now though


Natalie
Behave yourself! You know you’re hurting at the moment. That’s why we’re here for a girl’s weekend. I brought Michelle


Michelle
Hi


Jane
Hey Shelley erm…


Natalie
Evelyn’s on her way. Natalie and Michelle walk in and take their jackets off and walk towards the closet. Jane intervenes


Jane
I’ll take those


Michelle
Don’t worry Jane, relax sit down They brush past Jane and open the closet door


Jane
Oh God…They put their jackets in the empty closet, Jane’s face is of confusion, she looks around the living room for Sebastian whereabouts


Natalie
Is that breakfast I smell?


Jane
Huh? Yeah Jane opens the closet door then scratches her head


Natalie
Can I have some?


Jane
You’ll take it even if I say no


Natalie
Yeah I know, but it’s always nice to ask in advance…You want some Michelle?


Michelle
Already ahead of you


They walk in the kitchen whilst Jane searches behind the sofas; she is startled by plates cracking on the floor and then a scream


Natalie
Who the hell are you!!?!


Sebastian
Santa Claus


Natalie
What the hell are you doing in my best friend’s kitchen?


Sebastian
Eating breakfast. And could you stop spitting when you talk? Jane dashes into the kitchen Jane could you please tell your friend that a one metre radius between people doesn’t require such volumes of screaming?


Jane
What he said


Michelle
Sebastian what are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to meet up with Johnny and the rest?


Sebastian looks over at Jane


Sebastian
Yeah and I still am I just looks over at Jane


Jane
He came over to meet up with Johnny early but


Sebastian
obviously we had an argument before he got here so…


Jane
he felt compelled to try and console me and


Sebastian
she ended up cooking me breakfast


Natalie
Oh fair enough


Michelle
Hmm she stares at Sebastian who raises his eyebrows, she then stares at Jane so how come you said you was busy Jane?


Jane
Huh? Oh coz I didn’t need the whole world consoling me, one at a time is fine.


Natalie
This omelette is nice don’t you think Sebastian?


Sebastian receives a test message from Julian


Sebastian
…right I better be off now, it was nice seeing you Michelle and painful meeting you Natalie. Jane I’ll call you Looks at Michelle some…time.


Jane
Ok


Sebastian leaves the house in a hurry; as he walks down the path to the gate, a child stares at him directly across the road. He continues walking off; the child shakes his head and looks up at his house window where the telescope is placed directly opposite Jane’s living room


PART 9 is coming.....

2 comments so far....:

Anonymous said...

As always this was very very very good and captivating!!! As for that Jane...hmmmmm....bad bad girl!

Anonymous said...

The plot is thickening nicely, I'm looking forward to seeing what part the child plays in this and how Sebastian's gonna be around Julian and them.

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