Monday, March 9, 2009

Scriptwriter Chronicles: MEN ON THE ROAD (Part 25)

Part 25 - Til' Death Do Us Part

Jane sits in the hospital room, tears rolling down her slightly bruised face, her scratched hands form a headrest as she looks out the window. She turns around to have another look at Julian on the hospital bed. He has a host of bruises and bandaging as well as tubing on his body. He has been staring at her for the last few minutes after regaining consciousness...

Jane
You're awake?

Julian
Been awake for a long time, just trying to, you know, muster everything I heard before the crash Silence

Jane
Listen......she sighs

Julian
Where is everyone?

Jane
That's totally another story in itself

Julian
Where's my sister?

Jane
She's in another room with Gerald, Listen I...Julian interrupts

Julian
Gerald, is he alright? I remember us laying upside down in the car....

2 Hours Earlier.....David's car screams to a halt as other cars pile up in front of him. Nadine and Ritchie rush towards Julian's car with David not far behind. There are already bystanders in their droves looking on, the motorwat is at a halt. They look into the car and see that Julian, Gerald and Sebastian are all unconscious....

Nadine
Oh My God!! there's blood everywhere

Ritchie
Alright don't panic let's just get them out of here. Nadine try and open the door David goes round the other side to try and pull Gerald out, Nadine opens the door on the driver's side. Ritchie stares mencingly at Sebastian in the backseat who begins to gain consciousness, he proceeds to pull out Julian slowly It's ok Jules, it's Ritchie we're gonna get you outta here Nadine is in tears Ok here we go. You got Gerald David?

David
Yeah David pulls Gerald clear of the car while Ritchie pulls Julian someone call the Ambulance, Nadine

Nadine
One of the bystanders did it

Ritchie
Well call again!!

Nadine
What about Sebastian? Ritchie looks over at the car

Ritchie
What about him? Nadine cant believe her ears. Two bystanders pull Sebastian out the car as Nadine calls the ambulance. Wake up Julian, come on. Ritchie takes off his top to apply pressure to the blood. Sebastian meanwhile hobbles over to them suffering minor injuries.

Sebastian
Are they ok?

Nadine
I dont know, the ambulance are on their way. What happened? Sebastian ignores the question

Sebastian
How's Julian doing Ritchie? Ritchie ignores him Ritchie!? Im talking to you!! Ritchie gets up and punches Sebastian square in the nose, he begins to bleed

Ritchie
What gives you the f***** right to ask any questions ay?

Nadine
Ritchie! Nadine takes tissue out of her bag for Sebastian

Sebastian
What the f***!! Are you crazy! what the hell you playing at?

Ritchie
I cant find the right words for you now but once we get these into the hospital, believe you're gonna have to deal with me. He continues to apply pressure to Julian's side. David shakes his head at Sebastian

Back to present....Julian holds his side. Jane attempts to tend to him but he gently pulls her hand away. She turns away which is when Julian notices her bruises and scratches

Jane
I just wanted to help

Julian
Too late for that, I've heard what I needed to hear

Jane
What happened before the crash?

Julian
What happened to your head?....What happened to your face?

Jane
Let's just say you wasnt the only one involved in a crash collision

Just under 2 hours earlier....The women stand in different parts of the room shocked, confused and irate

Evelyn
No No No...what!?
wait no, this this...this...no! Jane takes a deep breath

Jane
It's the truth. I've been sleep with Sebastian Kim breathes heavily as Natalie and Michelle exchange contrasting looks

Evelyn
But I though Julian was cheating on you

Jane
What?

Evelyn
Yeah Joshua saw him dropping these reveals condoms as he went to his car

Kim
Those are mine! Kim snatches the condoms So he was gonna use them with you!?!

Evelyn
Huh? Wait what colour is Sebastian's car?

Kim
Red Evelyn begins to process her conversation with Joshua

Evelyn
Oh My God it makes sense. Jane you are...

Michelle
A F***** slut!! All this time you lead to me believe my brother was in the wrong when you've been spreading your legs for this cunt all along. Bitch!! Michelle tackles Jane to the ground and they exchange brutal slaps and punches. Natalie pulls Michelle off causing Kim to intervene. Kim pulls Natalie back allowing Michelle to take a swipe at Jane's hand. Natalie throws Kim to the ground and pulls Michelle off. The two stand side by side.

Kim
Why are you defending her?

Natalie
She's still my friend

Michelle
Bullshit you knew!!

Kim
You knew?

Natalie
How was I supposed to know he was seeing you?

Jane
Exactly he didnt mention it once!!!

Kim
I dont even wanna hear your voice right now Jane so if you know what's best for you you'll shut up

Michelle
So you think him not mentioning anything justifies your actions!?!? silence Yeah didnt think so. Im so angry right now, you made a prick of me, Evelyn and my brother

Kim
How long have you two been doing this for?

Jane
Oh so I should speak

Kim
I deserve to know this and dont get smart with me

Jane
...6 Months. Michelle looks disgusted I dont expect you to understand...but we loved each other

Evelyn
Oh My God Kim fumes

Michelle
What the hell do you know about love? You commit to marriage and move on for a fling as a result of love? You are a certified slut!

Kim
Where's my purse? Kim storms around looking for her purse, she takes a detour to the kitchen

Michelle
Why am I not on the other side of the room smashing your face in?

Jane
F*** you Michelle you don't know the issues me and him were through

Michelle
Oh please shut your dirty mouth. Issues my ass! You are a slut, a whore, a tart everything under the sun and when Jules gets back I hope he knows how to deal with you

Kim bursts through the kitchen door welding a knife. Michelle picks up a vodka bottle

Evelyn
Whoa! Whoa!

Kim
You wanna sleep with my man? Then pay the consequences. Jane backpedals and falls back into the sofa. Natalie puts her hands out and uges them to stop. Michelle chucks the bottle at Natalie but misses, and it smashes against the wall. Kim walks towards Jane but Evelyn stands in her way

Evelyn
Its not worth it Kim, put the knife down please Evelyn's phone rings, she picks up still attempting to block Kim. David now is not the right time...I'll call yo....an accident?

Back to present....Julian is still holding his side his breathing patterns are a little slower. He laughs a little...

Julian
So Evelyn thought I was cheating? that's funny

Jane
...yeah, I guess

Julian
Kim sounds really passionate. Willing to do anything for her partner Jane's guilt is clearly shown Oww Oww Oww Julian holds his side once more

An hour and a half earlier....Gerald and Julian lay on strecther beds in the hospital van. Sebastian has been treated for his minor injuries. The Police and Fire Brigade are present also..

Medic
You guys getting on?

Ritchie
No just me

Nadine
I wanna be on too

Ritchie
You dont even know us

Nadine
I dont wanna be anywhere near Sebastian

Sebastian
Im sick and tired of this bullshit. I have every right to be on that van too. I dont give a shit what you two think

Medic
Listen we need to get to the hospital now so either everyone get on or everyone get off; your friends need to be treated


David
Sebastian just come with me to the hospital

Policeman
Lady and Gents we'll be coming to the hospital to question you all shortly

Ritchie and Nadine get in the van while Sebastian gets in the car with David. Meanwhile Cameron receives a knock on the door. He opens the door to see Kim, Evelyn and Michelle...

Kim
We need to go to the hospital

Across the road Jane and Natalie go into Natalie's car...

Jane
I'm scared

Natalie
You knew what you were getting into...

Jane
No, No I didnt. I don't know Sebastian was seeing Kim, I didn't know Julian would be in an accident, a robbery or any of this. This is a mess. I hope he's alright.

Natalie
He'll be fine, Julian's strong

Jane
yeah...why do I feel like I made a mistake?

Natalie
Maybe you did. I mean Sebastian loves you but how can you trust him if he's able to cheat on Kim?

Jane
Turn the car around....

Natalie
What?

Jane
I want my wedding rings They turn around and drive past Cameron's car

Evelyn
Where are they going?

Michelle
Who gives a f***?

Evelyn
Michelle language

Joshua
It's ok I've heard worse from my brother Cameron and Kim are whispering to each other in the front seats

Cameron
They got arrested

Kim
Shit! What does that mean?

Cameron
Well Im gathering they are gonna get done for it, we just have to pray they dont snitch on the three of us. You gonna be alright though? today must of felt like a kick in the teeth!

Kim
You dont know the half of it. I didnt even get to slap the bitch. But you just wait what I do to her and that prick when we get to the hospital

Cameron
Just make sure you stay calm. The three of us dont need too much attention right now.

Back to present..

Julian
Why so quiet now?

Jane
I'm thinking; the doctor says you need to rest

Julian
It's not easy to rest witnessing what's going on around me

Jane
You didnt see anything Jules you were unconscious

Julian
Then tell me everything, I know there's more...

Just over an hour earlier...Julian and Gerald are pushed through the hospital by medics and doctors. Nadine, Ritchie, Sebastian and David are advised to stay in reception until further notice. There is major tension as they wait. Ritchie clicks his knuckles while Sebastian stares at him.

Sebastian
You have a problem Ritchie?

Ritchie
I dont think me having a problem has ever been in doubt, what you wanna ask me is "What is your problem Ritchie?" so ask again....

Sebastian
So Im guessing Nadine told you

Nadine
Told him what? David was actually the one to find out, I just confirmed it

David
It made sense in the end Seb, but this should be the least of our worries, you have two friends who are in vital conditions, sort out your beef later

Sebastian
You're right David but if I've learnt anything today its that things shouldnt be left unsaid til the last minute or you get bad results

Ritchie
No sleeping with someone you''re not supposed to leads to bad results. e.g a bloody nose

Sebastian
Dont be proud of your sucker punches Ritchie. It wont happen again. Ritchie squares up to Sebastian. Why dont you get over it? You were never gonna have her

David & Nadine
Huh?

Sebastian
She didnt ever want you, its just unfortunate she ended up sleeping with me

Ritchie
What the hell are you talking about? I didnt want Jane

Sebastian
Jane? Im talking about Nadine Nadine turns away

David
What the hell? Kim and Cameron walk in

Ritchie
You slept with Nadine too!!?!

Kim
Whaaaat?

Sebastian
Kim

Kim
Dont even call my name!! the receptionist is startled

Cameron
Kim, calm it down

Kim
No!! he slept with Jane AND my sister!! Evelyn, Michelle and Joshua walk in

Evelyn
You have got to be joking. Michelle storms towards Sebastian and slaps him hard across the face

Michelle
Bastard! Where's my brother and Gerald!?! Michelle walks over to the receptionist. The receptionist explains the situation until Michelle cant take no more. She storms off looking for one of their rooms. The receptionist follows after her.

Kim
Ok let me get this straight

Nadine
Kim wait

Kim
What is it with everyone interrupting each other when they wanna finish a sentence? Shut up and let me speak. Now laughs you points at Sebastian lied to me, stole from me and cheated on me with the wife of your friend laughs And then! to top it off you sleep with my sister Correct?

Sebastian
You dont need to do this

Kim
Correct!?

Sebastian
...yeah

Kim
So we were in a 9 month relationship and you were with Jane for 6 months? Ok Ok, so how long have you been seeing my sister?

Sebastian
I was never seeing your sister

Kim
Oh right. That makes it better, you just sleep with her

Nadine
It was one time and I regret it

Kim
When?.......WHEN!!?

Nadine
Today

Ritchie
What!?!

David
What!?!

Evelyn
Oh My god

Kim
Today?

Sebastian
It was an accident, I wasnt in the right frame of mind

Kim
Spare me please Seb, it's pathetic, just..just shut up. You're a cunt and you Nadine, much like Jane you are a slut

Nadine
Dont call me a slut

Kim
or what Nadine?

Sebastian
Thats enough. You're making a scene

Nurse
Excuse me if you guys continue we're going to have to ask you to leave Jane and Natalie walk in

Sebastian
Jane

Jane
Where's my husband? she looks over at everyone ...where is he!?! the nurse goes over to reception to call security

Nadine
Dont play the victim Kim, because it was you who nearly got Julian killed

Jane
What did you just say?

Cameron
Nadine shut up. To Jane she doesnt know what she's talking about

Nadine
Cameron give it up. Kim called Cameron's friends to kidnap Sebastian and rough him up but it was a case of mistaken identity and they got Julian

Jane
How do you know this?

David, Ritchie, Evelyn & Natalie
Yeah!!

Nadine
Because I know them too

Ritchie
You knew and you watched them just take him?

Jane pounces on Nadine and slaps her. Kim slaps Jane and Jane grabs a piece of Kim's hair and rams her knee into her stomach. Natalie gets involved and once again there's a melee in the middle of the hospital. David, Sebastian, Ritchie and Cameron break it up.

Jane
My husband could have been killed!!

Kim
Dont act like you care, you've been cheating for 6 months!!

Sebastian
You tried to kill me Kim?

Cameron
No she wanted you roughed up a bit, well deserved I say

Kim
No I wanted you shot in the end, I just knew my intuitions were right she spits out some blood

Sebastian
You are sick!

Jane
When I get my hands on you, you are dead! both of you!!

David
Cameron what kind of friends do you have? You let this happen to your own neighbours?

Cameron
I never knew

David
I cant believe Im hearing this

Nurse
Right thats it, all of you have to leave. Security come walking in, Kim smirks

Sebastian
Im gonna have you arrested, you're a mess security attempt to escort everyone

Jane
Let go of me she shrugs off Cameron and pushes security Where is my husband!?!


Security
Miss would you please follow me to the exit?

Jane
piss off!
Another melee erupts involving the group and security, slapping, kicking, pushing and shoving commence. The nurses call the police as doctors come through to try and help. Kim reaches into her purse and pulls out a gun

Kim
I'm not one for games, I am so not one for games!! she points her gun at everyone, they move back. The option is endless, I can kill each and everyone of you for different reasons. From the cheating scum to the slut and her best friend to my so called sister she cries. Sebastian, answer me this, truthfully, do you love me? silence well?

Security man
Say yes fool!!

Sebastian
Yes

Joshua
He's lying!!

David
Joshua step back

Kim
Let him speak! go on!

Joshua
I saw him go into Jane's house today and they were kissing like they were together. The same thing happened with my mum and now she's gone, thats not love
Sebastian's heart beats fast

Kim
This just keeps getting better and better, you just cant stop lying can you Sebastian? Tell me who you love and mean it and I'll put the gun down Jane, Natalie and Evelyn begin to cry.

Security Man
Dont fall for it Kim shoots him in the leg, everyone jumps in shock! Sirens are heard in the background

Kim
Shut up! Tell me!

Sebastian
....I love Jane alright.

Everyone flinches expecting the worse only for Kim to break down and cry. Ritchie walks away looking for Gerald or Julian's room, he shakes his head. At this point police swarm in warranting the arrest of Kim and Cameron. Everyone's at a standstill, Kim gives herself up and they are handcuffed and taken away; Evelyn and David plead with the police to no avail and the tears of Joshua and Nadine. The group follow them out the hospital while Jane cries in Natalie's arms. Security allow the two women and Sebastian to stay while police question the others. The doctor treating Gerald and Julian approaches them.

Doctor
Good news is that Gerald is stable, I believe your sister in law is with him. Julian is still in critical condition but for now he is doing alright. He needs rest.

Jane
I need to see him, I want to see him

Doctor
very well

Jane walks off with the doctor. Natalie and Sebastian sit in the waiting room opposite each other. No words spoken. The police come into question them.

Back to present...

Jane
And uh, thats what happened up until now...

Julian
Eastenders havent got nothing on this. I dont know who to hate more; Sebastian, Kim, Nadine, Evelyn, Cameron, Natalie...or you. Jane drops her head, Ritchie walks past the door and seeS Jane talking to Julian, he decides to leave them and goes to where Gerald is resting Do you love him?

Jane
No

Julian
Let me rephrase my question holds his side once more before you found out he had someone else did you love him?.........yeah

Jane
It was a sign to let me know what I was giving up

Julian
But you wouldnt of thought the same thing if it didnt happen

Jane
But it did

Julian
But what if it didnt?

Jane
But it did! Julian please. I do love you. Thats what these rings signify she pulls out their wedding rings from her pokcet Remember these?

Julian
Yeah I remember, I paid for 'em

Jane
We've said or done things we didnt mean and I want to start over

Julian
Its not as simple as that. he speaks slower to ease the pain You were.....willing to......willing to...holds his side break a marriage and a family...for a wild affair....for your own personal gain.....It's something that I cant forgive....or forget overnight

Jane
I understand that, but I need you, and I miss you, I miss us, the way we were

Julian
Yeah right, kinda like that text you sent, I gathered it wasnt for me in the end Jane puts her ring on her finger

Jane
Take this ring tries to put the ring in his hand

Julian
I dont want to

Jane (desperately)
please?

Julian
I cant

Jane
Julian just take the ring she cries harder and Julian takes the ring, his heart feeling weaker Thank you. Do you need the doctor?

Julian
Nope, everything is eaxctly how it's supposed to be. For the first time in this "relationship" Jane sinks in her chair I've been humbled....maybe it took you to cheat...for me to understand....I've learnt my lesson

Jane
Dont say that, I was a fool and I dont wanna ever lose you. The most important thing is that we stay together for the sake of us and our children Julian squints his eyes, he's silent for a moment and looks around the room, then speaks...

Julian
Could you go and get me the doctor please?

Jane
Push that button

Julian
It doesnt work, I tried a second ago. Ask specifically for Dr Kcabyap

Jane
strange name she gets up

Julian (mumbles so she cant hear)
You should hear it spelt backwards


Jane walks towards the door, Julian begins pulling vital tubes out of his body, his heart beat fading faster, Jane sees what he's doing in the reflection and turns around. Julian pulls out tube after tube and grimaces in pain. Before she can get to him his heart rate is too low, his head falls back and his arms swings down, his wedding ring falling to the ground. Jane presses the button to call doctors in. They come rushing in and try to bring Julian back to life. Gerald, Michelle and Ritchie come running in. Screams and loud cries fill the room as doctor's continue in an effort to bring him back. Natalie and Sebastian rush in, Jane is sitting in a chair rocking back and forth. Julian's eyes remain closed.

Too Little, Too Late.....

NEW SCRIPT TO COME IN MAY......


5 comments so far....:

T G G A said...

Genius, absolutely genius!! It all came together soooo well and I'm actually upset it's all over now. Jane is the devil about she tryin to get back with Julian and as for nadine, how can she sleep with her sisters man?!?!?

Well done for such an amazing script. Expect good things from you in the future.

Becks:) said...

Sundays will never be the same without this script (even though you hardly posted them on time). The ending was a shock!! I wanted Jane to suffer but not at the expense of Julian.

It was brilliant!! get it filmed! cant wait for your new story in May.

Stay Talented

Muffin said...

Noooooo, why did he have to die?! A very dramatic and intense ending to a fantastic script!

Caribbeauty said...

wel done Leon...despite the spelling mistakes...i was captivated throughouhgt man...

i certainly was not expecting that ending so that's great for it being unexpected...it's a shame julian had to die though...like...what about the kids man...lol

WELL DONE!!!!
I really enjoyed that...May cannot come soon enough trust me!

$hort 'n' $weet said...

wow...i refuse to believe this is one of your worst scripts! it was great;-)

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